Suffering through sexual degradation impacts victims at their core. Their overwhelming sense of having been polluted is ever present, long after their ongoing contact with the offender stops. Escaping the grasp of a predator can be a horrific struggle. Even once achieved, an indelible suffering permeates one’s body and mind long into the future. Continue reading What’s the proper penalty for rape by fraud?
Today, January 17, 2019, marks a day I’ve long awaited! The very first meaningful rape by fraud/deception/impersonation bill was introduced to Indiana’s House of Representatives this morning. HB 1584 was identified in a condensed reading by House Speaker Brian C. Bosna. It was authored by Rep. Donna Schaibley and supported by former Indiana State Representative, Sally Siegrist. Continue reading Indiana Launches Effort to Criminalize Rape by Deception!
Interested in helping to fight sexual assault by fraud or deception, case by defiling case?
Survivors of sexual assault by fraud have an almost impossible obstacle to hurdle in order to recover. Our justice system fails to prosecute, even in states with specific rape by fraud laws like Missouri where “Assent is not consent when induced by force, duress or deception,” – second degree rape. We need to identify legal help for the countless victims who have suffered this heartless deceit, whether through a civil or criminal action!
If you have the skills and interest to put these cases on the judicial map and lay a foundation for justice for so many, please contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Please identify “I’m a lawyer in ……..” naming your state in your subject line.
Together, we can make the world a safer place!
Bravo to Abby Finney for her bravery and to the staff at Nightline for presenting a balanced view of the issues! Here’s the Nightline Link
Tonight’s broadcast of Nightline, (12:35 AM, Tuesday morning on ABC) is scheduled to cover the new bill that is soon to be submitted in Indiana on Rape by Impersonation. It features Joyce Short, Sally Siegrist, the State Representative who championed the legislative change, and Abigail Finney, the victim in the Donald Grant Ward case that Ms. Short discusses in her TEDx Talk, When YES Means NO – The Truth About Consent.
Ms. Short covers the issue of #CONSENT and #FGKIA in greater depth in her new book, Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault that is currently available in a pre-release PDF, and will soon be released on Amazon.
Barring that no major news event prevents this episode from airing, you can live tweet Ms. Short @jm_short using hashtag #FGKIA for Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement, the meaning of CONSENT!
NYAToday Media – News for Young Advocates Today – has teamed up with ConsentAwareness.net to make #FGKIA, the meaning of CONSENT, crystal clear to the younger generation. Growing a generation of “consent savvy” kids is crucial for conquering sexual assault in our future! This kid-friendly “ConsenUal Campaign” speaks volumes in a colorful, entertaining format that’s perfect for young minds, and their families.
The information is available in English, Portuguese, Spanish and French, with more to come.
We welcome your questions and comments!
How a Betrayal Bond Works- And boy, do I wish it didn’t!
Emotionally intact people don’t just walk-out on love partners when they’re hurt by them. To onlookers, that behavior can seem very odd. A victim’s choice to remain in a toxic, harmful relationship can result from the chemistry of human bonding. Continue reading OK! Enuff with the Victim Blaming! How to spot a Betrayal Bond
Yesterday, a self-proclaimed psychic healer and “medium” was locked up for raping at least one, and possibly hundreds of victims by fraud. Joao Teixeira de Faria, also known as Joao De Deus and “John of God,” allegedly preyed on hundreds of women who visited his Continue reading Brazil- More Progressive on Rape by Fraud Than the US
Manchester, UK- Looks pretty innocuous, right? But this convicted sexual predator is guilty of assaulting two women through an elaborate scam. In one case he violently forced her. In another, he used a blindfold to trick her. His means of contact? Plenty of Fish which ranks highest on my list of e-dating sites for sex crime offenders.
Devereux hooked his targets by assuming the name “Dean,” posting an attractive profile, and grooming them to desire him over several months. Then he proceeded to convince them to have sex with his terminally ill friend “Rob” before meeting him. He also threatened to post intimate photos of one of the women on the internet.
Sexual Offense Prosecutor, Martin McRobb, explained Devereux’s method:
“Devereux worked on the emotions of these women over a long period of time, enticing them with a persuasive but utterly fake persona until they were desperate to meet him.”
“The decision making on this case was complex as on the face of it the women had consented to have sexual relations.” But, “this was not true consent as in the case of one victim she would not have submitted to sexual activity had she not been the victim of blackmail.”
McRobb’s understanding is on target in most aspects, but his terminology is flawed. He should watch my TEDxTalk! If we could straighten out society’s understanding, and enact the actual meaning of consent in our laws, his error would be visible to both McRobb and society.
“As on the face of it, the women had consented” is an oxymoron. Consent is freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement. “Agreement on the face of it,” is “assent,” not “consent.” They are both forms of agreement. But consent, not assent, is required for sex.
McRobb should have stated: “On the face of it, the women had agreed, but agreeing on the face of it is assent, not consent. Consent is required in sexual conduct. The victim did not consent.”
In the instance where a victim was threatened, such as by threatening to disclose intimate photos, that victim would be “acquiescing,” agreeing under duress. Agreeing under duress is not “freely giving agreement,” therefore, it is not consent.
Kudos to Prosecutor McRobb for successfully locking up a sexual predator. He was absolutely correct when he said:
“The effects upon Devereux’s victims are life-long and catastrophic. Their self-confidence and desire to find a meaningful relationship may never return.”
People who scoff at or fail to recognize the grotesque exploitation of rape by fraud have a great deal to learn about defilement. Yesterday, I was told that a recent rape by fraud survivor had approached the Ft. Worth, TX, Women’s Rape Crisis Center, and was turned away.
The victim, Dina, who was searching for healing and validation, had been horribly defiled. Not only had the offender lied his head off about anything and everything, he actually produced a forged divorce decree to prove he was single. He repeatedly engaged Dina in sex for several months…I’m sure you know how this ended!
Dina has been to the police. She’s consulted with lawyers. She’s been Continue reading Carnal vs. Intimate Defilement- Why It Matters, Everywhere, Including Texas
While the Longhorn State is long on “consent” definitions, they apply to theft but not sexual assault.
Texas legislators make the same outrageous mistake other legislators make. They act as if the meaning of the word changes Continue reading Texas Needs a “Consent” Overhaul!
David Mack deserves an award for his outstanding article on Rape by Fraud in today’s BuzzFeed!
In The Wrong Man, he captures the horrific sexual deception committed by Purdue University student, Donald “Grant” Ward, explains the suffering of his victim, Abigail Finney, and enlightens us about the legal confusion that mires the understanding of society, legislators and law enforcement alike over sexual assault. Continue reading BuzzFeed Zooms-In on Rape by Fraud!
In a move that underscores the indecent state of immorality in Indiana’s sex crime laws, rape charges against Donald Ward were recently expunged from his criminal record. This revision underscores how desperately every resident of Indiana, and certainly every student attending college there, needs Indiana’s laws to change! Continue reading “IN” state laws support “IN”decency!!
Jamaican law is far superior to US law when it comes to recognizing the horror of rape by fraud! Read this important article, written by Orville Taylor and published today in The Gleaner in Kingston Jamaica. Pay close attention to this statement:
“Indeed, capacity is also affected by knowledge so that if someone pretends to be someone else and gets to engage in intimate contact with the ‘victim’ by fraud, it is assault and rape if it goes far enough. Believe it: If a woman masquerades as a man, and, based on deception, gets into sexual activities with a heterosexual woman, it is also assault.”
There is simply no excuse for our US laws to disregard the heinous assault on the victim in cases where a sexual predator’s weapon of choice is trickery!
If our laws were clear that consent is freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement, #FGKIA, accountability would exist for all types of sex crimes, not simply the specific mentions our law makers call “sexual assault” or “rape,” while completely ignoring all the rest!
Watch this TEDxTalk and call your legislator!
None of the states or territories of the US properly define “consent” in their laws. 76% of the states and territories of the US have NO provisions for consent in their penal code. 24% have provisions that poorly define consent and only make prosecution possible in a small amount of cases. Here are the three largest obstructions that keep lawmakers from adopting correct consent laws, right out of their own mouths: Continue reading 3 Roadblocks that Prevent Prosecution for Sexual Assault
Today, WISH-TV in Indiana featured a new rape bill, the first of its kind for the state, and soon to be law, if IN State Rep. Sally Siegrist gets her way!
Siegrist’s efforts are the direct result of the acquittal of Donald Ward, a Purdue University student who slipped into bed with a Continue reading New Rape Law for Indiana?
Anita Hill struck the nail on the head today in her opinion piece in the NY Times, A special investigation is called for in order to truly determine the merits of the case against Kavanaugh.
A special investigator can look at the polygraph results and interview Continue reading How Anita Hill and #FGKIA go hand in hand!
Was Saturday’s US Open match a clear case of misogyny? Can we infer that the official, Carlos Ramos, acted out of contempt for women?
For those who are unaware of the circumstance, the short story is that Serena Williams was given three successive and progressive penalties, which arguably could have made a difference in the outcome of the match. The unfortunate result is that the actions of Continue reading #Serena and #Consent
Women have no monopoly when it comes to sexual assault. The US Justice Department tells us that approximately 20% of sexual assault victims are male.
Dr. Paul wrote to me about a year ago. He was searching for answers for his wife who’d been badly deceived by her ex husband. She suffered terrible trauma and he wanted to help her recover…. or so he thought at the time. But over that year, their relationship became less bearable as he learned that emotional pain can wound so deeply, it can change a person’s character and turn them into an ogre…… even women.
Continue reading Sex Crimes- Women Aren’t the Only Victims
July 25, 2018- NYC- A major milestone to define CONSENT took place today! Subsequent to my TEDx Talk, “When YES Means NO, the Truth About Consent,” two legislators, Indiana State Representative, Sally Siegrist (R) and NY State Assembly Member Rebecca Seawright (D) pledged their bipartisan support to establish a clear definition for consent in the laws of their respectively red and blue states. This meeting of the minds shows that no matter what your politics, we can all unite against sexual assault!
Rep. Siegrist, who successfully fought for legislation to curb human trafficking in Indiana in last year’s legislative session, is determined to conquer sexual assault for her state. Here’s the link to her newsletter. Together with Assembly Member Seawright, a long time champion for women’s rights and the former Chair of the Board of the Feminist Press, they make a powerful pair!
Clearly defining consent will enable the police, prosecutors, judges and jurors to hold sexual predators accountable under the law and prevent the confusion between what constitutes “bad sex” or an actual sexual assault.
“Confusion over what consent actually is makes it difficult for society to comprehend. Our laws don’t tell us the definition. They only tell us what “consent” is not. We need laws to express the real meaning of consent…. Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement, #FGKIA,” says Short.
Both Indiana and NY will have legislative efforts to drive the issue of consent forward, and YOU can help! If you’ve been the victim of a sexual assault in either Indiana or NY and would like to speak out at a legislative hearing on this issue, please complete the totally private form below.
Also, if you are interested in helping to get other states to focus on this issue, please complete the form that follows.