Tag Archives: #FGKIA

Steve Humanick Is Back in Court

Steve Humanick of Stone Harbor, NJ

April 18, 2019- Doylestown, PA- Steve Humanick of Stone Harbor, NJ, faced two accusers yesterday in open court. One victim is currently seeking a restraining order against him to protect herself and her family. The other previously received a settlement in a civil action against him, and testified under oath that Humanick had raped her. Continue reading Steve Humanick Is Back in Court

#FGKIA Rape Law – Even more important today than ever!

Being a law maker does not give the legislators in Alabama, Mississippi, Ohio, Georgia, Kentucky, Arkansas and Utah the right to bully women into their personal religious beliefs. And where are those religious beliefs when legislators refuse to protect against rape by denying that freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement, #FGKIA, must be present in order to engage in sex? Anything less is sexual assault!

Every state and territory of the US enables sexual assault by failing to provide an #FGKIA blanket of protection from rape. Instead they pick and chose specific nonconsensual acts to prosecute. It’s gross indecency to fail at rape protections while insisting victims give birth to the product of their own defilement. Sexual assault will only be conquered when each state insists on freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement in all sexual conduct.

The European Union has recognized #FGKIA in cyber security. Today, if you conduct business on the internet in Europe, you are held to the code of GDPR which clearly defines consent. It’s time for our legislators to provide protection for sexual conduct like it does for business conduct.

The more things change, the more they stay the same get worse

Century after century, generation after generation, men created the rules of law…… and women suffered their indecency. Our forefathers, and btw – many were steeped in their own immorality, having affairs, mistresses, and coercing illicit sex – created our constitution with a separation between church and state. Yet in every state that has sunk so deeply into misogyny that it undermines a woman’s right to chose, the defense is the religious belief that life begins at a heartbeat,

That’s certainly not my religious belief nor is it the religious belief of scores of US citizens. It is unconscionable, and unconstitutional for a legislator to misuse their authority to impose their religious beliefs on others.

Not a single legislator who claims their life began at a heartbeat can recall what they experienced in their first trimester because they did not have a functioning brain. They were plasma. They could neither think, feel, nor sustain themselves. Yet these globules of plasma, nourished and nurtured by a woman’s body, matured into human form and turned against the rights of the very women who brought them to life.

Whether or not a legislator believes that abortion is or is not acceptable for them, they have no right determining what is right for anyone else on religious grounds. No one can undeniably say, accept by belief, not fact, when life actually begins. Does it begin at conception? Does it begin when the brain is formed and cognizant? Does it begin when the fetus is self-sustaining? No one has the right to determine the answer for another person. No one.

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Watch this TEDx Talk! Call your legislator! Demand change!

Monumental Rape by Fraud Bill Passes in Texas!

Eve Wiley says she was shocked to learn the sperm donor her mother chose was not her father -- the doctor who performed the artificial insemination procedure was. (Ashley Landis/Staff Photographer)
Eve Wiley, catalyst for Texas sexual assault by fraud law

Kudos to Eve Wiley from Dallas TX, who inspired a precedent setting sexual assault by fraud bill, approved by legislators in Austin yesterday!

Speaking about the offender, Representative Stephanie Klick, the bill’s sponsor in the House of Representatives, said, “This is a person who you really trust and they betrayed you. This would be considered a rape because you are doing something without consent.”

Klick was referring to the case of Wiley’s mother who had been duped by Dr. Kim McMorries. As seen on ABC’s 20/20, he artificially inseminated her with his own sperm instead of that which she selected from donor #106. Wiley researched the donor database and learned who donor #106 was. She reached out to him and they formed a close knit, loving bond, only to find that he was not her father after all…… McMorries was.

While Klick’s comments were directed to the specific type of fraud committed by McMorries, her concept on the illegality of being defrauded of your sexual autonomy rings true for every single case of sexual assault by deception or impersonation.

A shot heard ’round the world?

Senate Bill 1259 demonstrates the overall problem with sexual assault laws in Texas. Texas has a provision about consent in their penal code. Section 1.07-19 clearly states “Consent is not effective if induced by force, threat or fraud.” But in case after case, when victims of sexual assault by fraud bring their claims to the police, they are told consent applies in theft but not in sexual assault. In fact a police Sergeant in Ft. Worth stated, “Consent is not an element of rape in Texas.” (The status of consent in each state and territory of the US is described in “Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault.”)

Texas is not alone in their failure to recognize or apply consent properly. As described in the TEDx Talk, “When YES Means NO – The Truth about Consent,” the recent Bill Cosby conviction demonstrated Pennsylvania’s failure to define consent. And even with the acquittal of Donald Grant Ward in Indiana, who admitted to defrauding a woman for sex, lawmakers were unable to pass a bill to recognize his conduct as a crime.

Hopefully, this Texas bill, once signed into law by Governor Greg Abbott, will serve as a launching pad to raise awareness about the use of fraud in sexual conduct and insure that anyone who uses deception to violate another person’s reproductive organs, is a criminal. Meanwhile, all nonconsensual sex is a crime, whether the state recognizes it or not!

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Want CONSENT clearly defined in your state?

3 Consent Crusaders Meet with Lawmakers!

Left to right- Nina Lucas, PA State Senator Katie Muth, Joyce Short, Cheryl Carmel

Just like postal carriers delivering important mail, neither gusty wind nor heavy rain deterred our staunch “Consent Crusaders” from descending on the Pennsylvania statehouse this past Monday. I was joined by Nina Lucas, our PA Consent Awareness Outreach Ambassador, and Cheryl Carmel, Foreperson for the Bill Cosby jury. We addressed a bipartisan group of five representatives – several of whom were surprised to learn that consent is not defined in their penal code. In attendance were State Representative Wendi Thomas, State Representative Joe Emrick, State Senator Katie Muth and her Legislative Director Sonia Kikeri, Legislative Director David Kozak representing State Senator Wayne Langerholc, and State Representive Joe Ciresi. Each attendee received a copy of Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault and information specifically geared toward the issues in Pennsylvania.

Cheryl Carmel explained that the jurors asked Judge Steven O’Neill what the word “consent” meant in law and they were surprised that no specific definition had been codified into Pennsylvania’s statutes. They were told that as “reasonable people” they needed to use their best judgement, and they did. As the Foreperson, Carmel was tasked with pronouncing Cosby, “Guilty, Guilty, Guilty,” on all three counts.

Image of Wendi Thomas

Rep. Wendi Thomas had begun some of the heavy lifting to create a bill by reaching out to a lawyer to lend a hand. She recommended finding a way to insert a definition in existing law. We’re looking forward to seeing the results of her efforts.

What can you do to help?

  • I know I sound like a broken record, but the more people who watch my TEDx Talk and read Your Consent– the better informed you and society will be! Please watch, read and spread the word!
  • Call your legislators and demand change.
  • If you’d like to be an Outreach Ambassador in your state or territory, reach out to me at Info@ConsentAwareness.Net.

Texas Rape Law Ignores a Vicious Form of Fraud – And so do most states!

Image result for implantation photos

Watch #SeedOfDoubt on ABC’s 20/20 tomorrow night, 10/9c,  to see yet another way the laws of Texas denies justice to its residents! 

Be sure to watch this compelling story, and contact your legislators to demand that “fraud” be an element of sexual assault in your state!

20/20’s episode shows how a young woman who came to life as the product of artificial insemination, believed her father was donor #106, and they enjoyed a close father/daughter bond….. except….he wasn’t really her father.

Consent is the critical key that should separate lawful contact with a victim’s reproductive organs from unlawful contact. Yet in Texas, sexual assault law does not protect against a fertility doctor swapping sperm to implant his patient…. a decidedly vicious sexual assault by fraud.

Consent is not simply agreement.

Consent is freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement, #FGKIA.

Unless and until Texas Penal Code applies consent appropriately and states that all conduct involving a person’s reproductive system – that lacks consent – is a crime, criminal behavior such as this will continue to fall through legal loopholes.

Swapping sperm violates victims on several fronts:

  1. Fraud vitiates the consent form which was required in order to perform the medical procedure since the patient was not knowledgeable….. rendering the medical procedure an illegal act.
  2. Fraud violates the victim’s sexual autonomy, a sexual assault,  because the patient was not knowledgeable and informed. She could only “assent” which means “agreement on the face of it.” She could not “consent” which means “freely given. knowledgeable and informed agreement.”
  3. In matters of reproduction, fraud creates the bond of pseudo-family. Revelation could be devastating to all parties.

The laws of Texas are upon you, or, at least, they should be

In Texas, “consent” is ignored where rape and sexual assault is concerned. In several efforts to report rapes to various precincts, police officers, and even a Sergeant, recently told victims, “Consent is not an element of rape in Texas.”

#SexualAssault Laws without #FGKIA!

Violating consent is clear when someone steals property…. but the same consent provision that protects property is not applied in protecting a person’s sexual autonomy. Instead, the legislators of Texas have chosen specific acts of sexual assault to prosecute… a system consistent with using an umbrella made of Swiss cheese to protect against  a storm.

Texas should take a cue from Missouri or from my TEDx Talk! 

Unlike Texas where fraud only protects against theft and not sexual assault, Missouri’s Rape in the 2nd Degree statute clearly states: “Assent is not consent when induced by force, duress or deception,” While Missouri expresses when consent does not take place, my TEDx Talk, “When YES Means NO – The Truth about Consent,” clearly defines what consent actually is – Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement. #FGKIA!

Did the patient freely give the doctor knowledgeable and informed agreement? There’s no Swiss cheese when #FGKIA is applied. It’s an all-encompassing umbrella!

Continue reading Texas Rape Law Ignores a Vicious Form of Fraud – And so do most states!

Today’s NY Times- Is Sex by Deception a Form of Rape?

Today’s NY Times – Is Sex by Deception a Form of Rape?

Kudos to Abby Ellin for getting this right!! As an author about a very contentious subject, I’m often concerned about my words getting twisted, but Ms. Ellin was thorough about the important points and spot-on in the message she’s conveyed.

The #FGKIA definition for consent, “Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement,” is the REAL definition for consent.  We need to drive #FGKIA into the consciousness of society! Adopting this language into law will not only open society’s eyes to defrauding victims of sex, but will help conquer all forms of sexual assault! We can no longer tolerate our legislators picking and choosing specific types of sexual assaults to prosecute, when ALL FORMS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT IS – WAS – AND FOREVER WILL BE A CRIME!

Failure to recognize this definition not only impacts sex by deception victims, but prevents society from understanding what actually constitutes rape.

For the NY Times to be dealing with the issue of sexual assault by deception is a huge step forward to enlighten society. Please read this article and write your opinion in the comment section. Use your voice to make the world a safer place!

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On Amazon – https://amzn.to/2S9ZUJu

Watch this TEDx Talk

Read Your Consent  – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault

Participate in the #PutCONSENTtoMusic Song Contest

Call your legislator and demand change!

Your sexual assault story can make a difference!

Speak to me- Tell me your story!

Were you denied a police report when you summoned the courage to unburden your soul at a precinct? Did your aching heart get re-victimized when they told you the damage you suffered was not enough to warrant their attention?

Perhaps you were so concerned they wouldn’t help you that you didn’t even try. And maybe you were surrounded by people who Continue reading Your sexual assault story can make a difference!

New Cosby Book Underscores #FGKIA Definition of Consent!

NORRISTOWN, PA - JUNE 17: Actor and comedian Bill Cosby arrives for the sixth day of jury deliberations in Cosby's sexual assault trial at the Montgomery County Courthouse on June 17, 2017 in Norristown, Pennsylvania. The jury is attempting to break its deadlock and reach a unanimous decision on any of the three counts of aggravated indecent assault the comedian faces. (Photo by Kevin Hagen/Getty Images)

Almost one year from the date of disgraced comedian Bill Cosby’s conviction as a sexual predator, April 26,2018, a new book will be released that supports, categorically, that my recommended definition for #CONSENT – Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement, #FGKIA, – is absolutely correct!

Huge thanks to Nina, from New Jersey, for passing this information along!

Chasing Cosby: The Downfall of America's Dad and more at TEDx Talk Your consent- The Truth about ConsentNicki Weisensee Egan’s new release, “Chasing Cosby, The Downfall of America’s Dad,” tells the story of the jury’s deliberations in the Cosby case. As I stated last year in my TEDx Talk, When YES Means NO – The Truth about Consent,” the first question the jurors asked Judge Steven O’Neill was “What’s the meaning of consent.” Because there is no consent definition in Pennsylvania’s laws, all he could say was “Use your common sense.”

Page Six covered the story of the book’s release yesterday. Fortunately, the foreperson for the jury, Cheryl Carmel, had been working with a newly enacted European data protection law. She told her fellow jurors, “This is the most far-reaching law anywhere in the world for individual privacy, and the basis of the law centers around an individual’s ‘consent.’ ”

The Page Six article states:

The definition of consent in this privacy law states it must be freely given, specific, informed and unambiguous. It must be given by a clear affirmative act; it must be demonstrated that each of the above tests occurred, and it must be able to be withdrawn at any time.

“This is the privacy definition,” she said. “Surely, there is a specific legal definition of consent for criminal acts such as aggravated indecent assault.”

It turns out there isn’t, at least not in Pennsylvania.

The jury sent a note to the judge, requesting a definition of the word. The judge replied in open court. His reply was perplexing to the jury; they were informed that there isn’t a definition — that is, Pennsylvania law does not offer a definition of “consent,” and the judge advised the jurors to define the word for themselves.

Convicting sexual predators cannot rely on Cheryl Carmel being the foreperson for every sexual assault jury!

As I clearly stated in my TEDx Talk, every state and territory must have a clearly stated and accurate definition for consent that guides people’s behavior and holds sexual predators accountable. My TEDx Talk and my book, “Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault” focuses on the consent issues from state to state and clearly explains why Nonconsensual Sex Is Sexual Assault, and CONSENT is Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement, #FGKIA!

It’s not over ’til it’s over, and you can do your part to insure it never happens again!

One of the oldest doctrines in law is “Nulla poena sine lege.” (How old? It’s Latin! It dates all the way back to the Roman era.) It basically means, “What is not prohibited by law is permissible.” This doctrine keeps the gates open on whether the judge and jury were within the bounds of PA law in determining Bill Cosby’s fate, a premise Cosby’s attorneys will likely argue upon appeal.

This doctrine and its application are the route of why we must have an overall recognition that nonconsensual sex is sexual assault in our penal codes. Law makers could not even begin to state the infinite ways a person can be sexually assaulted, just as they cannot possibly predict the infinite ways a person can be murdered. We know when someone kills another person by any means, they are a murderer. Our laws must reflect that when someone sexually violates a person by any means, they are a sexual predator committing a sexual assault.

You can help make a difference!

You can stand up for defining consent as #FGKIA in the laws of every state, including PA, and establishing that Nonconsensual Sex IS, WAS and ALWAYS WILL BE, Sexual Assault!

Help get this across to society by doing the following today:

Watch my TEDx Talk

Purchase “Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault”

Call your legislators and demand change! 

Tulipan Argentina’s New Condom Packaging Adds to CONSENT Confusion

Embedded video

Tulipan, an Argentine condom manufacturer, created new packaging to promote the “No Means No” concept of consent. Their box requires four hands to open. But this packaging fails to recognize that someone can be forced, coerced or deceived into cooperating. And when that happens, CONSENT is not present no matter how many hands have stirred this pot!

Less than 15% of Argentine men are estimated to actually use condoms. Never-the-less, this version of consent confusion intensifies the mischaracterization of consent as agreement by any means.  While “No” always means “No,” “Yes” only means “yes” when it is “freely given, knowledgeable and informed.  #FGKIA!”

Just like a Marlboro cigarette box is required to display a warning, Tulipan’s boxes should bear this notice:

“Regardless of how many hands open this box, consent is not present if either party has been forced, coerced or deceived to secure their agreement to sexual conduct.”

Why Federal Sex Trafficking Law but no Federal Sexual Assault Law?

 

The Thinker by Auguste Rodin

Rodin’s figure of The Thinker was originally cast for his design of “The Gates of Hell,” the entrance way to a museum that was never built. It’s planned use seems analogous to the harm all rape victims endure, regardless of how they were raped. And it’s high time all of society rethinks what constitutes sex vs. what constitutes sexual assault!

Laws set the stage for moral reasoning and should apply to all things, equally Continue reading Why Federal Sex Trafficking Law but no Federal Sexual Assault Law?

“Your Consent” New Book- Released Today to Conquer Sexual Assault!

 

On Amazon – https://amzn.to/2S9ZUJu

Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault launched on Amazon today! It’s ranked #1 in New Releases – Law Dictionaries and Terminology!

Knowing what I do about sexual assault, that our laws really don’t define “consent” correctly, it pains me to see all the misguided efforts by intelligent, serious minded people who try to come to grips with the rampant volume of sexual assault. There really is one, and only one, necessary solution…. correctly defining consent in our laws, and creating a fully encompassing sexual assault provision to sync with that definition.

Without taking this critical step, sexual assault will never be defeated! Instead, we’re simply sticking a band aid over an amputation. #MeToo has highlighted the problem but too many sexual assaults are falling through the cracks in legal loopholes or being termed “confusion” or “bad sex,” by an unknowing society.

How terrible are our current laws?

My ConsentAwareness.Net friends who are fighting to change the laws in Texas know only too well how absurd the current laws are in their state. They’ve been to five precincts in the last couple of weeks. Even though Texas has a reasonably clear definition, it is only used to thwart thieves, not rapists. In fact, in the specific words of a precinct Sergeant in Ft. Worth…. “Sexual assault is not defined by consent in Texas.” If you think your state is better at recognizing sexual assault, think again!

Curbing crime takes both definitions and provisions

To fight sexual assault, we need new language that identifies what consent actually means…… “Freely Given, Knowledgeable, and Informed Agreement.” And each state or territory needs a statute that unequivocally states, “Nonconsensual sex is sexual assault.”

Penal Code definitions AND provisions need to work in unison in order to make sense. Having one without the other is an ineffective non-starter.

The solution’s not rocket science. It’s plain and simple. It’s been ignored for centuries because our laws reflected the concepts that women, the largest share of sexual assault victims, were chattel. Their virtue was a commodity owned by someone other than them. What happened to them, as second class citizens, was irrelevant. Because few actually examined our laws and researched the misconceptions that enables rape in our present society, nothing substantive has been done about it.

I’ve researched our laws….It’s time for a change!

Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault conveys the issues in plain language. Whether you’re a legislator, an educator, a judge, juror, or simply a concerned person, you can easily understand the message it conveys. This book can make a world of difference, and YOU can help make that happen!

  • Please get your copy today!

  • Please provide a comment and a rating!

  • Please help this work get noticed by the mainstream. It costs less than lunch money and can make the world safer for you, your children, and your children’s children.

Thank you!

Hmmm- Where’s my prize for World Poetry Day?

Joyce Short delivering My Consent at TEDx Talk

Got this blast this morning from The NY Times.

It’s Thursday — and it is World Poetry DayEnjoy these recommendations from David Orr, who writes the On Poetry column for the Book Review.

 

Guess Mr. Orr doesn’t include poems from TEDx Talks on his list of best poetry for 2018 because my poem was peculiarly missing.  (Please read that as an effort toward humor.)

But really, in honor of World Poetry Day, and to refresh minds about the gravity of sexual assault….. I repeat it here:

MY CONSENT

My body’s not a token, not a prize.

Don’t defile me with coercion, force, or lies.

My body’s not yours to take; it’s mine to give.

My body’s not your entitlement; it’s where I live!

 

Don’t think consent’s a privilege; it’s a must,

No matter how intensely you feel lust.

F-G-K-I-A, Keep your rape mentality away.

F-G-K-I-A, Sign it into law today,

Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement!

 

Watch my TEDx Talk and call your legislator. Use your voice to make the world a safer place!

 

Put #CONSENT to Music! CONTEST!

Win a $1,000 prize by singing about #CONSENT!

Is the word “CONSENT” music to your ears? Join this #PutCONSENTtoMUSIC contest!

ConsentAwareness.net and NYAToday Media have teamed up to spread the meaning of CONSENT – #FGKIA – around the world!

The definition of “consent,” both in society’s understanding AND our laws should be #FGKIA – Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement. Your music can make it happen!

Below are lyrics in search of a melody! Simply watch this TEDx Talk and follow NYAToday, (both are completely free,) then post your version of this song on YouTube by June 15, 2019. If your version is the most liked on YouTube, you’re the winner!*

Be sure to post your own comment on your version to engage your audience. You can ask them what they think about consent and to support your song!

*Follow the guidelines listed below. 

#FGKIA Is How I Spell Consent!

 

I see you making eyes at me,

You’re playing with my heart,

But let’s be clear,

You need to hear,

Before we even start……

 

I’ve got some rules

Don’t think like fools

Who take what I won’t give.

Respect for me, It’s got to be..

This body’s where I live!

 

F-G-K-I-A, that’s how I spell CONSENT!

I’m not a sugar-coated prize,

I’m not entitlement!

It’s privilege getting close to me,

I’m giving you my trust.

Don’t scare me, force or lie to me,

To satisfy your lust.

 

F-G means freely given,

Not taken by some trick,

Not fooled, not forced, not compromised,

Too young, too drunk, too sick.

 

KI’s informed agreement,

With knowledge as my guide.

Consent is my decision,

Not stolen when you lied.

 

F-G-K-I-A is how I spell CONSENT!

I’m not a sugar-coated prize,

I’m not entitlement.

Don’t make decisions for me,

My body’s mine to share,

With someone who I chose to be,

Not someone who you scare.

 

So hear me out,

Don’t fuss or shout,

It’s how it’s got to be.

There’s no mistake,

It’s give, not take,

Respect my boundary.

 

F-G-K-&-I-A is how I spell CONSENT!

I’m not a sugar-coated prize,

I’m not entitlement.

It’s privilege, getting close to me,

I’m giving you my trust,

Don’t scare me, force or lie to me,  

To satisfy your lust!

 

Yes…

 

F-G-K-&-I-A is how I spell CONSENT!

I’m not a sugar-coated prize,

I’m not entitlement.

Don’t twist my arm, don’t do me harm,

Don’t lie, or shout or scare.

Before we start, you’ll win my heart,

And show me that you care.

Song Contest Guidelines

  1. Contestants can use the exact wording of this poem or change it to suit their needs. They may also use the poem from the TEDx Talk, When YES Means NO, the Truth about Consent. But all submissions not using either poem must contain #FGKIA at least 3 times and define the meaning of consent in a positive way that includes “freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement.”
  2. The melody must be original.
  3. The song may not contain vulgar or sexually explicit language.
  4. The video may not display any graphic sex act.
  5. All contestants must watch the TEDx TalkWhen Yes Means NO, – The Truth about Consent and provide a YouTube comment.
  6. All contestants are encouraged to post a link to NYAToday’s platform which allows for thoughtful engagement between youth, worldwide, about important issues of today. Your song with a post that describes why you decided to enter this contest and how you’re teaching people about consent in your daily life can boost engagement and help drive more buzz to your song contest submission.
  7. Entries must be titled “#FGKIA Is How I Spell Consent – Your name, or the name of your group or band.”
  8. Entries must have a minimum of 50 likes by 10 PM EST on June 15, 2019, to be eligible for prize money.
  9. Contestants who are under the age of 18 must supply permission from a parent or legal guardian to be eligible for prize money. Have them write to info@ConsentAwareness.net with their permission.
  10. Submissions are the property of the contest owner.

Can’t sing but would like to help…..

Your contribution will enable us to broadcast this contest to a wider audience and make a 2nd and 3rd place prize possible. Here’s a PayPal link for your contribution of any amount or simply inquire at info@consentawareess.net. No contribution is required for anyone to participate in this contest.

 

Manafort & Fraud- But still no Rape by Fraud in NYC

Paul Manafort- Convicted Felon

In addition to prior convictions, Paul Manafort will be tried for fraud in New York City. We see clearly that lying to take your money is a crime. But lying to induce sex is not? On what planet?

When an offender lies to secure mortgage money in NY City, all hell breaks loose. But if that same offender lies to get laid, defiling your body and causing you extreme depression, loss of self worth, and trust issues for the rest of your life, that’s no big deal?? Continue reading Manafort & Fraud- But still no Rape by Fraud in NYC

Speaking at Church of the Advent Hope- 3/23

Church of the Advent Hope

Will you be in NYC on March 23rd? If so, you’ll receive a warm welcome at the Church of the Advent Hope when I address the congregation on:

What does CONSENT really mean? 

 

As all who read this Web Page know, “Consent” is the crucial weapon in the war on sexual assault! Come help spread the word and find out what you can do to create a society of consent-aware children, our best hope for a safer future.

Address: 111 East 87th street

Time: 2 PM

Consent – Assent – Acquiescence: What’s the dif?

#CAD or #CarnalAbuse #FGKIA #RapebyFraud

It took me 4 years to write my first book, Carnal Abuse by Deceit. I published it in 2013. That means I began the process of trying to straighten out society’s understanding and laws on rape ten years ago. In those ten years, I’ve probably seen every definition of assent, acquiescence and consent that exists in the English language, right, wrong, and in between.

And I’ve recognized that society has a knee jerk reaction to considering non-violent sexual assaults as “rape.” I’ve learned not to split hairs over semantics; particularly because sexual assaults that are non-violent should be considered a lesser offense than violent sexual assaults. But all sexual assaults, whether violent or non-violent, should be covered by penal code because every victim who is sexually assaulted is defiled, whether or not violence was used against them.

Assent:

Except for the misunderstandings that lump assent, consent, and acquiescence all together as synonyms – which they’re not – you’ll see that assent is a superficial type of agreement. Anyone who nods their head and says “yes” is assenting.

In 1946, an American military tribunal conducted military, criminal proceedings against 23 German medical professionals for their crimes against the human race. They had cooperated in or conducted ghoulish experiments using live humans during World War II. The Nuremberg trials, as they were known, gave voice to Nuremberg Code which guides medical experiments throughout the US. Nuremberg Code identifies that even a child, who has not yet reached the age of reason, can assent. Simply saying “yes” is assenting,

Nuremberg Code also tells us that saying yes when you have all the facts, are capable of reason, and are not being pressured, is “consenting.” Nuremberg Code requires the subject of a medical experiment to “consent.” If that subject is a child, their agreement could only be considered as “assent.” In order to conduct such an experiment, the child would have to sign an “assent” form. The parent or legal guardian would sign a “consent” form.

Acquiesce

Alleged sexual predator Harvey Weinstein heads for court

When a person acquiesces, they are assenting. But not everyone who assents is acquiescing. They could be agreeing but not because of fear. Acquiescence is agreement under duress, (fear/pressure.) You could also say that acquiescing is assenting under duress. But as Nuremberg Code points out, a person who consents must do so of their own free will. So a person who is pressured by fear to assent is not consenting. They are acquiescing.

Deception:

In legal discussion regarding contracts, your assent can be nullified if the basic facts by which you assented were misrepresented (fraud). Although you agreed on the face of the information you were given, your assent is vitiated. Since you were not knowledgeable and informed, although you assented, you did not consent.

Why are these differences important? 

We need for society to understand the difference between various types of agreement in crystal clear, simple terms. Our law makers are clear that we need “consent” to engage in sex. But they are clear as mud, and frequently incorrect, about what consent actually is.

In practice, from coast to coast, what is not expressly prohibited under the law is permissible: therefore, until we express that “nonconsensual sex is sexual assault, and consent is freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement” in our laws, all instances in which a specific defiling act takes place without a specific penal code prohibition, that conduct cannot be prosecuted.

Several states say your “words and overt actions” are consent. Nope, if your words and overt actions result from force, duress, or deception, they are absolutely not consent. “No” means no, but “yes” only means  yes when it’s not induced by force, duress, or deception. Only in rare cases do our laws uphold this principle.

As I’ve struggled with the process of motivating legislators to deal with this issue, I’ve seen that their interest in ignoring deception is deliberate. It’s far too consistent to be otherwise. Model Penal Code’s description, “Consent is ineffective if induced by force, duress or deception,” is too widely known for the omission of deception to be seen as simply an oversight or not relevant.

Our law makers have been truly callous to the harm a person suffers when they are tricked into sex, and they envision that these cases will “clog up our courts.” The fact that the victim’s self determination over their reproductive organs has been violated is irrelevant to them.  The end result; however, is that their failure to identify what consent really means feeds the rape mentality that harms sexual assault victims all across the spectrum.

What can be done about it?

#MeToo and #TimesUp have identified that sexual assault is rampant, but even their efforts fail to reach to the core of the problem. Correctly defining consent in our laws would guide behavior and hold sexual predators, who prey on people for sexual contact in a myriad of ways, accountable.

Very few states correctly identify the relationship between assent and consent. Missouri is one of them.  Missouri. 556.061 (14) states: “Assent does not constitute consent if (c.) It is induced by force, duress or deception.”

Why not? Because consent is freely given (not forced or coerced (duress)), knowledgeable and informed (not deceived) agreement. #FGKIA!

Yet when it came to prosecuting Mario Antoine, who tricked over 30 victims into sex, the SVU Prosecutor in Kansas City MO, Jill Icenhower, failed to prosecute.

Here’s Nuremberg Code:

“The person involved should have legal capacity to give consent; should be so situated as to be able to exercise free power of choice without the intervention of any element of force, fraud, deceit, duress, over-reaching, or other ulterior form of constraint or coercion; and should have sufficient knowledge as to enable him (or her) to make an understanding and enlightened decision.

The solution:

The solution for holding all sexual assault offenders accountable is for our laws to recognize that all –

Nonconsensual sex is sexual assault – and

Consent is Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement – #FGKIA!

This isn’t rocket science. It’s just plain common sense! Call your legislator and demand that they enact this new, consent-based language to prohibit all forms of sexual assault into the laws of your state, today!

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Help to adopt appropriate laws to conquer sexual assault today! Read Your Consent and send it to your legislators.

Demand change! 

Anti “Rape Justice” Is Law- And the reason we have so much sexual assault

Thomas Jefferson, President and father of 5 children with slave, and sister to his wife, Sally Hemmings

RAINN tells us that sexual assault happens every 98 seconds, and it happens to a child every 11 minutes.

Anti “rape justice” language and attitudes are embedded in our laws. It’s been with us century after century because sexually amoral law makers deliberately and callously made it this way – Here’s a list of known federal leaders with horribly flawed ethics whose mentality shaped, and shapes, our laws. Here’s a list of state and local officials who have done the same.

Present day law makers have either inherited their rape mentality or see no political advantage in changing it. Some simply don’t want to buck heads with constituents who could provide them with votes and backing, and whose sadistic sense of entitlement hides behind claims like:

  • “Government should not interfere with private, personal conduct,”
  • “Changing the laws would turn justice for sexual assault into a slippery slope,”
  • “Minorities are unfairly treated so we shouldn’t recognize and prevent more crimes.”
  1. Protecting its citizens is absolutely the most critical responsibility of government, and particularly, when a crime is so abhorrent that it undermines a victim’s psyche for a lifetime. It is absolutely essential for government to step up!
  2. The minefield of seeking conviction does not prevent us from recognizing when crimes such as extortion, murder and stealing occurs. It should not prevent us from recognizing when a victim is sexually assaulted. We need laws to define that all nonconsensual sexual conduct is a sexual assault, and that consent is freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement, #FGKIA, in order to protect against sexual assault. Laws that are common in several states claim that a victim’s “words and actions” constitutes consent. Nothing could be further from the truth when those words and actions are induced by force, duress or deception. Yet in the following states, your words and actions could enable a sexual predator to escape conviction: California, Colorado, DC, Minnesota, Montana, New York, Vermont, Washington, and Wisconsin
  3. Our justice system needs an overhaul. No one should be treated more harshly because of their ethnic background or the color of their skin. Failing to recognize when someone is raped is not the means by which we can address the injustice in our justice system.

Immorality starts at the top!

Century after century, men have governed our country who were embroiled in sex scandals. Several gave birth to offspring with slaves. In fact, Thomas Jefferson’s mistress was the enslaved sister of his wife.

  • Thomas Jefferson
  • Andrew Jackson
  • William Henry Harrison
  • John Tyler
  • James Garfield
  • Grover Cleveland
  • Warren Harding
  • Franklin Delano Roosevelt
  • Dwight Eisenhower
  • John F. Kennedy
  • Lyndon Johnson
  • George H W Bush
  • Bill Clinton
  • George W Bush
  • Donald Trump

Donald Trump, whose wife voiced serious violent rape accusations against him, and whose corrupt lawyer, Michael Cohen, defended his actions by incorrectly stating, “You can’t rape your wife,” sits at the helm of our government today. Is it any wonder that we have an uphill battle to stop rape in our lifetime?

You can help bring about change!

Watch this TEDx Talk and get your copy of Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault. Share these links with everyone you know! Demand your legislators change our laws!

 

 

 

Indiana Fails to Enact #RapeByFraud Bill

HB 1584, the bill to address a gaping, rape loophole in Indiana’s laws  – the one that failed to convict Donald Grant Ward of sexual assault – will not see the light of day in the 2019 legislative session.

Grant Ward, as his friends call him, climbed into the upper bunk where a female student was fast asleep in her boyfriend’s dark, dorm room at Purdue University. She awakened because she felt her breast being touched, and then… he sexually penetrated her.

Ward knew he was tricking her into thinking he was her boyfriend. He admitted so to the police. He was arrested for rape, He was acquitted on the basis that his conduct was not a crime in Indiana’s laws. To add insult to the already egregious injury he and the jury’s decision caused the victim, the judge expunged his criminal record.

Ward’s attorney, Kirk Freeman, exploited the weakness in Indiana’s laws by defending his client’s conduct and by preening about his behavior; referring to him as “my boy” like a proud papa. His attitude exemplifies the patriarchy that perpetuates rape mentality and continues, unabated, in Indiana.

Indiana’s laws say nothing about the type of sexual assault Ward conducted. Nor do they say anything about the definition of consent. This failure could have, and should have, been corrected in this legislative session. It won’t be. How many additional victims must be raped before Indiana’s legislators see the light?

What does this legislative failure say about safety in Indiana’s colleges and universities?

Personally, if I had a daughter, the very last place I’d send her off to school right now would be Indiana. While Purdue, Notre Dame, and Indiana State enjoy high rankings in educational excellence, I’d be horrified that the Indiana legislature showed gross disregard toward protecting my child, and concerned she could suffer a similar fate…….. with absolutely no accountability or justice. (And BTW- rape can happen to our sons as well as our daughters.) Given a choice, I’d be looking at universities in states where my child would be protected by appropriate laws.

As if this incident at Purdue were not enough to convince me to educate my child elsewhere, Purdue is currently being sued for expelling two students for reporting sexual assaults.

Some other states to consider

The Hon. Mandy Powers Norrell, South Carolina State Representative

The Hon. Mandy Powers Norrell, South Carolina State Representative, is currently undertaking to protect the residents of her state from Ward’s behavior and further incidents of sexual assault. Her bill, H 3829, is pending in her state.

Alabama and Tennessee have existing laws that make Ward’s behavior a crime. Both laws are identified in my most recent book, Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault, which shows the consent provisions from coast to coast, explains why rape by fraud is a crime, and clearly defines how “consent” should be expressed in each and every state across the US and around the world.

What your raped daughter or son could face – for the rest of their lives

No matter what form of rape a person is subjected to, rape never leaves their psyche. Rape invades the most private part of a victim’s being and pollutes even the most remote corner of their mind. It takes a great deal of effort and therapy to  learn to compartmentalize defilement into a part of one’s brain where it no longer interferes with daily functioning.  Even once a survivor makes peace with what happened, they can be plagued with recurring suicidal ideation, depression and interpersonal dysfunction for life.

As a rape survivor, I, and millions of other survivors, have good reason to feel re-victimized by the oversight of Indiana’s legislators. While Donald Ward’s conduct harmed one victim, the legislative decision to ignore HB1584 failed millions of present, past, and future rape victims. Failure to pass this important bill lets the copy-cat out of the bag because it tells sexual predators that there are no consequences for conducting the heinous defilement of rape by fraud or impersonation in Indiana.

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Society and our lawmakers must be clear on what consent really means in order to conquer sexual assault! Please register for this booklet today! Together we can fight sexual assault and make the world a safer place!

Every nickel from the proceeds of this book’s sales will be used to fight for sexual assault laws!

 

 

What’s the proper penalty for rape by fraud?

Mario Antoine- locked up for 10 years for cyber crimes but nothing for rape by fraud even though the prosecutor called him a “serial rapist” and over 30 women came forward with claims against him.

Suffering through sexual degradation impacts victims at their core. Their overwhelming sense of having been polluted is ever present, long after their ongoing contact with the offender stops.  Escaping the grasp of a predator can be a horrific struggle. Even once achieved, an indelible suffering permeates one’s body and mind long into the future. Continue reading What’s the proper penalty for rape by fraud?

NIGHTLINE! Tonight! ABC! Joyce Short on Rape by Impersonation Law for Indiana!

Tonight’s broadcast of Nightline, (12:35 AM, Tuesday morning on ABC) is scheduled to cover the new bill that is soon to be submitted in Indiana on Rape by Impersonation. It features Joyce Short, Sally Siegrist, the State Representative who championed the legislative change, and Abigail Finney, the victim in the Donald Grant Ward case that Ms. Short discusses in her TEDx Talk, When YES Means NO – The Truth About Consent.

Ms. Short covers the issue of #CONSENT and #FGKIA in greater depth in her new book, Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault that is currently  available in a pre-release PDF, and will soon be released on Amazon.

Barring that no major news event prevents this episode from airing, you can live tweet Ms. Short @jm_short using hashtag #FGKIA for Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement, the meaning of CONSENT!