Finding Closure After Exploitation- Lauren’s Story – Part 2

If you missed Lauren’s first installment, you can find it here. This true story demonstrates the value of being able to seek justice…..

Finding Closure After Exploitation

Finding Closure After Exploitation-

Part 2

Several months later, in 2014, he came to visit me in Florida, and I was astounded when he made a plea for $65,000 to help with a series of desperate situations. When I told him I did not have the money, he asked me to get it from my retirement funds. Continue reading Finding Closure After Exploitation- Lauren’s Story – Part 2

Finding Closure After Exploitation- Lauren’s Story- Part 1


I’m often asked why having the ability to seek justice is so important for victims of sexual fraud. I’ve seen that the pursuit of justice, regardless of the outcome, can bring a sense of closure and empowerment that turns victims into survivors. Continue reading Finding Closure After Exploitation- Lauren’s Story- Part 1

Sex Trafficking Bill- You can help..TODAY!

A federal bill to stop “Sex Trafficking” comes up for a vote on the House floor today! You can help by contacting your federal legislators to insist they enact this important bill into law!

Kids aged 12 to 16 are typically the targets of traffickers, but anyone can be lured or abducted into this sordid cycle of violence, drug abuse and defilement.

Here’s all you need to say when you call…..

I’m your constituent and I request you pass the Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act (FOSTA) today! And please be sure to pass the Mini Walters Amendment that holds internet companies responsible when third parties post information that enables sex trafficking on their sites!

Sexual Battery by Ruse in Virginia

A state with a brain!


Virginia’s Penal Code addresses rape by fraud in a clear manner. Using “ruse” to undermine a victim’s consent is considered Sexual Battery, a Class 1 misdemeanor.

Crimes like the one committed by Donald Ward in Indiana, should qualify as Sexual Battery by Ruse in Virginia. Ward crept into the bed of a sleeping co-ed at Purdue University and engaged her in sex. The victim was asleep in her boyfriend’s bed and believed Ward was him.

Virginia’s treatment of sexual assaults is sensible. Their penal code divides misconduct by forcible and aggravated cases and lessor crimes. Initial violent convictions result in felony charges, but repeat misdemeanor offenses will raise the level of the charge to a felony.

Most sexual battery offenses, whether violent or not, will result in mandatory registration on the sex offender list.

Additionally, Virginia will prosecute offenders who transmit Aids, HIV, Hepatitis B or Syphillis.

If you’ve been sexually assaulted through a ruse in Virginia, please notify me at

Code of Virginia § 18.2-67.4 – Sexual battery

18.2-67.4. Sexual battery.

A. An accused is guilty of sexual battery if he sexually abuses, as definedin 18.2-67.10, (i) the complaining witness against the will of the complaining witness, by force, threat, intimidation, or ruse.

B. Sexual battery is a Class 1 misdemeanor.

What is Rape Mentality and How Can We Stop It?

Until #MeToo, rape mentality was far more widespread than society recognized. The fact that so many celebrities, politicians, successful businessmen and more were recently exposed for abhorrent sexual acts, shows how well-hidden rape mentality has been. Even the President of the United States thinks that forcing his wife into sex is acceptable behavior – a recognition that Continue reading What is Rape Mentality and How Can We Stop It?

Scathing Rape by Fraud Loss in Indiana!

Is #DonaldWard guilty of #RapeByFraud?

Lafayette IN- Donald Grant Ward,  was found “not guilty” of rape by fraud by an Indiana court on Tuesday, Feb 6, 2018. Ward, a Purdue student, was accused of stealing into the victim’s bed, under the cover of darkness, and pretending to be her lover. He was not acquitted on the merits of the accusation, but rather on whether, in Indiana, his conduct constituted a crime. The verdict clearly demonstrates that Indiana’s rape laws need fixing!  Continue reading Scathing Rape by Fraud Loss in Indiana!

#KISS Away Sexual Assault! #FGKIA

Ever heard the term “Keep It Simple, Stupid?” I don’t think any of you are stupid…. it’s just a metaphor. But applying the #KISS theory to sexual assault laws could save countless victims!

Our laws on sexual assault are not only stupid and ridiculous, but they’re the reason rape mentality exists! The solution isn’t rocket science… it’s simple! Here’s what the laws for sexual assault should Continue reading #KISS Away Sexual Assault! #FGKIA

Olympic Doc shines glaring light on #SexualAssaultByFraud!

Convicted Sex Crime Offender, Larry Nassar

I truly hate being an “I told you so,” And nothing could make me dislike this role more than knowing that 156 unfortunate girls suffered a horribly defiling crime – one that I’ve been jumping up and down to stop for the past 5+ years!

Yesterday, Dr. Lawrence Nassar, former USA Gymnastics team doctor, was sentenced to a 175 year prison term after 156 of his sexual assault victims stepped forward. He’d molested them by using Continue reading Olympic Doc shines glaring light on #SexualAssaultByFraud!

Hear Us ROAR! #WomensMarch2018 #MeToo #TimesUp and #FGKIA!

NY State Assembly Member Rebecca Seawright and I

Amid shouts of “Hey-hey, ho-ho, Donald Trump has gotta go!” and “Trump is not my President, You’re fired White House resident!” throngs of women, men and children wound our way through the streets of midtown Manhattan yesterday. The sea of hopeful faces marched forward in solidarity with hope for renewed political integrity and equality for all mankind.

While I try to refrain from comparing anyone’s pain to the harm experienced by others, recent political impacts have helped me recognize how struggling through injustice with no possible relief makes people feel invisible. Hearing hate speech and seeing sexual dysfunction from institutions we relied on as the source of decency, cuts deeply into our collective self esteem. It was uplifting to travel together, surrounded by those who embraced morality and humanity,  even if only for four hours.

The sight of the Trump Hotel inspired my sense of irony as I invited my favorite New York State Assembly Member, Rebecca Seawright, to join me in holding up my poster:  CONSENT = #FGKIA, Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement. I pray we can see these words indelibly inscribed into the penal code of NY and every state before we march again in 2019!

You can help by calling your legislators to demand that they make it happen! #FGKIA can be the solution for #MeToo, #TimesUp and the gross confusion over sexual assault and sexual harassment that enables sexual predators like Weinstein, Cosby, Moore and Trump to go unpunished. It can end the invisibility that sex crimes create in a world blinded by ignorance!

Call your legislator and say, #FGKIA – Sign it into law today!



Today! Joyce Speaks on City College of NY’s- WHCR – @ 5 PM EST

Another Perspective WHCR 90.3 FM

Be sure to listen as Joyce speaks with Henry Porcher, this evening’s host, of Another Perspective, about #MeToo, #TimesUp and #FGKIA!

5 to 6 PM on Friday, January 19th

Listeners are welcome to call-in and voice their opinions and questions at 212-650-6903. 

This broadcast will be live-video-streamed at for viewers around the world. And listeners can tune in to 90.3 FM.

Here’s your opportunity to speak up and show your support for #FGKIA law! I’m counting on you!


Colorado’s Rape Laws- Updated, but antiquated!

Colorado revised their statutes on sex crimes in 2016. In doing so, they recognized certain, but not all, rape by fraud crimes.

Their laws make a critical distinction between sex crimes with or without penetration. The former is “sexual assault.” The later is “sexual contact.” The degree of the crime determines the ultimate Continue reading Colorado’s Rape Laws- Updated, but antiquated!

Is NYPD’s Midtown North Precinct Complicit in a Sex Crime?

To people who understand the meaning of consent, it seems that last night, the police at the Midtown North Precinct in Manhattan, lead by Commanding Officer Peter J. Venice, aided and abetted a sex criminal.

Commanding Officer Peter J. Venice

The victim, I’ll call her Jennifer, read her complaint from a prepared statement because she was nervous and upset. The female desk officer,  Officer Balslov, read her statement and said: “I’m not following you. I can’t do anything with this,” as she tried to hand the paper back to Jennifer.  “You’re just angry because you found out he was married.”

Balslov certainly got that part right…. the victim is plenty angry and has every right to be!

The denial of his marriage by the offender, Bill, made every bit of sex they engaged in a sexual affront – sexual misconduct – against her!

His lie about his marital status, a lie he perpetuated over several months, deprived her of her right to make an informed decision about her body. Instead he undermined her free will by falsifying information that was critical to her, and engaged her in adulteress sex. The thought that he misused her reproductive organs this way is appalling to her.

A serial offender

Bill’s done this before….. multiple times. He leads women into thinking he’s marrying them. In fact he goes down to the courthouse with them to obtain a marriage license. Then he leaves them “standing at the alter.” One woman he did this to committed suicide.

Not only did he express his intentions to spend his life with Jennifer, he conducted unprotected sex with her on the belief that he wanted to start a family with her.

Enter Sergeant Alicia

“But you had a relationship with this man,” argued Sergeant Alicia, Balslav’s superior officer.

“No, I never had a relationship with THAT man. The man I had a relationship with was single, not him!”  said Jennifer.

Relationships not only don’t matter, they make the harm even more deplorable!

Sergeant Alicia should know that sex crimes take place whether the victim knows the assailant or not. It’s the reason that the rape exemption for married couples bit the dust in NYC many years ago. And the federal government followed suit in recognizing that a spouse could be raped.  Commander Venice should properly inform his officers that violence between strangers is not the only way to commit a sex crime. And when that offense is committed over and over again, the pain of discovery can be overwhelming.

An ignorant legal department weighs in

Sergeant Alicia excused himself to call the “legal department.” When he returned he said, “They said you don’t have a crime; but you can hire a lawyer and file a civil complaint.”

The job of our legal system is to provide relief in the form of justice for people who are wronged. Jennifer is not after money. Money won’t help her restore the dignity he stole from her. That’s what criminal actions are for. That, and the protection it provides for society.

Jennifer wants to make sure that no one else Bill meets ends up committing suicide as a result of getting swept into his deranged concept of entertainment.

“Did he hold you down and make you do it?” asked Alicia.

Sergeant Alicia was confused about what the term “sexual misconduct” means, and what “consent” means. Sexual misconduct, in NY State, is charged when the parties “engage in” sex without consent. It’s a Class A Misdemeanor. “Engaging in” does not mean that violence is present, despite Alicia’s denials and statements to the contrary. And his concept that anyone can “consent” to “engage in” sex when their brain is deliberately blindfolded by the offender is pure balderdash!

Could this be the case that opens society’s eyes to the real meaning of CONSENT? 

I sure hope it is. Stay tuned!

You can help by reading Combating Romance Scams, Why Lying to Get Laid Is a Crime! and calling your legislators to demand #FGKIA law.





#TimesUp and The Importance of #FGKIA!

Consent = Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement! #FGKIA

Will #TimesUp, the new sexual harassment awareness effort by prominent women of stature, ignite the fire that eradicates sexual assault? If they do the following, they will!!

Standardize CONSENT PROVISIONS in penal codes

across the US and beyond!

#MeToo exposed the problem of sexual assault and harassment. Now we need to go the next step and secure the solution!

Why is correctly defining and standardizing “consent” so important? Continue reading #TimesUp and The Importance of #FGKIA!

Invalidation- The Reason Victims Don’t Report Sex Crimes

When you were a child, did your big brother steal from the cookie jar and blame you? Perhaps your parents punished you by having to write 100 times, “I’ll respect my family’s property, I’ll respect my family’s property, I’ll respect my family’s property.”

How did being falsely accused make you feel?  Continue reading Invalidation- The Reason Victims Don’t Report Sex Crimes

Salon’s Concern on Right-Wing #MeToo Backlash

Andrew Leonie, former TX Asst. Deputy Attorney General, stepped down after mocking #MeToo

Today, Amanda Marcotte at Salon ran a valuable piece on the conservative attempt to trash the #MeToo movement. I agree; it’s coming!

Instead of being appalled at the vast quantity of complaints, and recognizing how wide-spread sexual assault and sexual harassment actually are, they are misusing “quantity” to obfuscate and diminish reality. In their convoluted interpretation, the larger and more exposed the problem gets, the less it can be believed. Nothing is further from the truth. Their rationale simply reveals how corrupted their values truly are.

I wrote a response to the Salon article. Please give it a “like” in the comment section for Salon.

There are people who, as a result of their DNA and their developmental issues, lack the brain chemistry that produces appropriate caring for their fellow man and makes them me-centric. They are unable to grasp why they have no right to impose their sexual desires on another. They look at others as objects of their desires, not human beings deserving of respect. There are a lot of them. And they carry out their assaults, victim after victim, which is why so many people have been harmed.

This objectifying of victims, mostly women, will not stop by exposure alone. There needs to be teeth in the laws that guide behavior. Without it, evil people will simply continue to harm others. There must be penal code that prevents them from doing so. We do not have it.

Although the ItsOnUs Pledge states clearly “Non-consensual sex is a sexual assault,” this language has NOT been enacted into the penal code of any state. And if it were, it would still require correctly defining the meaning of consent- freely given, knowledgeable and informed agreement, #FGKIA, into law. Without doing so, sexual assault will continue. Adopting these two important statements into law will stop rape mentality!

Call your legislator! Turn them into law, today!


India Understands What “Non-Consensual” Sex Really Means!

This story seems so familiar to many of us in the US. Yet NOTHING happens to put creeps like this guy behind bars here!

It’s not as if the victim was violently raped…. she wasn’t. But she was dealt the crushing blow of being defrauded of sex.

The victim’s father had posted her profile on a matrimonial site. Allegedly, Sameer Anwar Khan responded, claiming to be a police officer and a suitable suitor for his daughter. He actually pretended to marry this 22 year old woman by creating faked documents! Nothing he said or did was the truth.

This predator will not be dealt with as if he committed a violent rape. But he will be dealt with for the lesser charge of rape by fraud. He will do time for his misdeeds and be fined. And that’s how rape by fraud should be treated around the world!

YOU can make that happen, and prevent sexual assaults of all types while you’re at it! Pick up the phone! Call your legislator! Insist that they sign this language into law today…..

“Non-consensual sex is a sexual assault!”
“Consent is Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement!”


Don’t just “like” this message. Pick up the phone! Make it happen!

We CAN combat all kinds of sexual assaults, today!

Joyce on BlogTalkRadio- Dr. Brenda Wade Modern Love

Dr. Brenda Wade- Modern Love

Log onto BlogTalkRadio to hear Dr. Brenda Wade and I discuss how the same neurotransmitters that got you hooked into a toxic relationship can help you unhook and reclaim your life! Click this link.

You can also secure “20 Ways to Combat Sorrow and Loss Around the Holidays” by using this link.

I sincerely hope that these efforts help you have your happiest holiday season ever!

Doug Jones’s Victory Strikes at the Heart of Sexual Assault!

Like a magnet, yesterday’s senate vote in Alabama glued sexual assault victims to their news sources to watch the count unfold! I too rode the peaks and valleys with mixed joy and bewilderment as the results seesawed back and forth. Jones’s ultimate victory restored my faith in mankind.

It’s hard to fathom how voters could fail to recognize the horror of Roy Moore’s behavior and put their selfish interests above morality! It shows how little concern and recognition they have for the sexual sanctity of others. What we can see in the results, a narrow margin – 49.9% vs. 48.4% – is the completely self-serving narcissism with which a large swath of society conducts itself.

The message behind the vote

Looking at those figures, it’s not difficult to understand why sexual assault is so rampant in our nation. The problem is exponentially worse than the numbers indicate because sexual predators don’t simply harm one person. They commit serial acts of defilement. Someone who is blind to the harm of sexual assault is capable of sexual assault. The Alabama vote shows us just how pervasive the problem actually is.

Donald Trump gave us an important glimpse into his soul, or lack thereof. Even though he initially supported Moore’s rival, Luther Strange, for the Republican nomination, he shifted his support to Moore despite the horrid allegations of sexual assault against minors. His behavior clearly demonstrated how people who support sexual predators can be sexual predators themselves. Just as Roy Moore should be investigated, so should Donald Trump. He’s proved, over and over again, that he is unfit for the office of the Presidency. His support behind Moore reveals the sinister underpinnings of his soul, and his ruthless ability to cast morality aside for his personal agenda.

We have a bigger enemy than ISIS in our midst. It’s the grotesque immorality of Trump and his supporters who are imploding our society’s values from the inside without firing a single shot or hurling a single bomb.

20 Ways to Combat Sorrow and Loss Around the Holidays

Our brains control our minds, and WE control our brains!

Our best bet to bring joy back into our lives, once we’ve experienced devastating loss, is by reprogramming our brains!

Neuropsychology is the melding of two separate but related studies….

Pshychology, which attempts to resolve why and how we think the way we do by examining our emotions and our developmental experiences,

Neuroscience, the biology of the brain.

By joining both studies together, we can see how the brain, a three pound glob of sophisticated jelly, controls our lives…. Or does it?

Can we control our brains to make improvements in its functioning? Neuropsychologists tell us that the brain possesses neuroplasticity, the ability to constantly change through cell reproduction. So are we married to our grief, or even our beliefs? And can we impact our emotions and thoughts in a positive way… toward permanent change?

Our brains contain a hundred billion nerve cells, divided among hormones and other brain chemistry, synapses, protoplasm, and a host of complex structures. The area of our brain that processes emotions is the amygdala which is found in the limpid system, mid brain, at the point where a line between both eyes would collide with a line connecting our ears.

Our right amygdala processes negative emotions like fear and sadness. Our left amygdala processes happiness, as well as sadness, but is also believed to control our reward system. The amygdala launches the brain and body’s reactions to outside stimuli, particularly those that elicit fear, anxiety and love.

How can you stimulate your way out of depression?

Our brains produce four types of neurotransmitters that promote feelings of well-being and happiness: dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and endorphins. Each can be harnessed in a variety of ways to pull a person up from despair.

By completing the following form, you’ll receive your list of 20 simple ways to stimulate your good-vibe hormones into action. It’s my holiday gift to you with the hope of making your holiday season as bright as possible, for now and for always!

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