David Mack deserves an award for his outstanding article on Rape by Fraud in today’s BuzzFeed!
In The Wrong Man, he captures the horrific sexual deception committed by Purdue University student, Donald “Grant” Ward, explains the suffering of his victim, Abigail Finney, and enlightens us about the legal confusion that mires the understanding of society, legislators and law enforcement alike over sexual assault.
The same misunderstanding about rape by fraud applies to all forms of sexual assault because legislators fail to properly define consent in our laws. In fact, 76% of the states and territories across the US have no consent definition at all. And the rest concoct absurd definitions that skirt around the issue in order to deliberately refrain from overwhelming the courts with sexual assault cases.
If they took the right stand, and enacted consent-based laws to protect society, (instead of cherry-picking specific types of sexual assault that they’ll prosecute,) locking up sexual predators like Bill Cosby, Harvey Weinstein, Larry Nassar and Donald Grant Ward, would be a slam dunk and sexual assault would greatly diminish!
Everyone would totally understand where seduction ends and sexual assault begins. But in the interest of letting some sexual predators off the hook, victims are short changed validation and the justice they deserve.
Until sexual assault laws are CONSENT-BASED, society will continue failing to recognize when and how sexual assaults take place. ALL nonconsensual sex, not just certain types of nonconsensual sex, are sexual assault.
Consent is “Freely Given, Knowledgeable and Informed Agreement #FGKIA.” It’s not rocket science! Applying this correct definition for consent to our laws makes it obvious why force, duress and deception are the horrific crime of sexual assault.
Watch this TEDxTalk for more details. Share it with everyone you know!
Get your copy of Your Consent – The Key to Conquering Sexual Assault. Send it to your legislators and tell them how important defining consent is to you!
Deb- Lawmakers argue that victims should be suing for emotional distress. But violators do not necessarily have assets that would make suing them worth the cost or the heartache.
“Grant” Donald Ward is a student. And BTW- I have reason to believe he is still a Purdue student even though he is no longer at the same campus – where he is considered persona non grata. Suing a student with no income and limited assets would be futile and an emotional upheaval. This case is exactly why we can’t rely on civil laws to make a dent toward the justice the victim deserves.
In a NJ case, I’m told the offender had defrauded the victim of $232K. She also lost fines from the IRS and additional funds he bilked off her credit cards. She sued, got a judgement, and bupkiss – No assets, no traceable income. How do you collect?
Finally, a NJ Prosecutor went after him. Faced with jail time, he coughed up a commitment to pay, even though the amount he agreed to was a paltry $75 per month. If he defaults, he’ll get locked up, and at least his character became public record. His name is Haissam Fostok. https://consentawareness.net/2016/03/23/haissam-fostok-arrested-today-for-catfish-crimes/
I believe this was rape. He admitted that he took advantage of her not knowing who he was. That being said, a lot of these problems would not exist if people confined their sexual activity to marriage. Why is she (presumably) having sex with a “boyfriend” of three weeks, in his dorm room with three of his friends mere feet away? Is this what “Women’s Liberation” looks like? Very trashy behavior. I assume this is the norm in these mixed dorms.
Blaming the victim does not excuse rape.
First off…. your assumption that they’d known each other for only three weeks is not supported by the article. You’re assuming that “several” means three.
What I know of this crime, through a third party, is that Abby was fast asleep. The article is specific that the boyfriend had been in her bed for several hours. Abby would have been in a deep state of unconsciousness when Ward entered her bed.
No matter whether a person is married or not, they should not be sexually assaulted. Chattel, the concept that chastity is a commodity your husband owns, should not exist in the modern era. That is the basis by which lawmakers failed to recognize this crime in the past. Today, we recognize that each woman is entitled to autonomy over her body whether married or not. Our laws need to change to reflect that woman be treated as equals whether married or single.
I am shocked after reading the news on BuzzFeed of the roommate who tricked roomatr’s girlfriend into having sex. Is there anyway this
Could be seen as possible attempted murder or assault, negligent bodily harm? Did the man who did this ever have sex before? Yes probably. Was he tested for HIV/STDs before he initiated the assault? Probably not. He may or may not have these issues. Such an negligent infliction of trauma surely would require, at the minimum, payment for mental issues and or physical problems that could arise? I am sick that there is no recourse for many of these women. Surely the twin could be brought on charges of fraud? Thank you for sharing your stories and working so hard to correct these antiquarian laws.