I’ve researched sexual assault laws across the country and back again. As a survivor, the author of 3 books on the subject and a TEDx Talk presenter, I can tell you, emphatically that we have so much sexual assault in our nation because our lawmakers are principally male!
Century after century, men have created the laws that kept us “LESS THAN!” We need to change this dynamic, and we need to do it NOW!
Seventy-six percent of the states and territories of the United States fail to define CONSENT in their laws.
I have fought to change this for the past 10 years. Today, a legislator in NY and another in Indiana, if re-elected, have pledged to adopt new laws on sexual assault in their states. They are Asm. Rebecca Seawright, a Democrat in NY City, NY, and Representative Sally Siegrist, a Republican in West Lafayette, Indiana. If you live in either location, and want to see a change in the prosecution of sex crimes, vote these ladies back into office!
As an advocate, I’ve spoken to men and women on both sides of the aisle. The single most common male-legislator resistance I receive to rightly defining consent in our laws is that our courts would be overwhelmed with sexual assault cases. Every time I hear this absurdity it blows my mind! Without realizing it, what they are saying is that they know how frequently sex crimes defile victims, but they are okay doing nothing about it!
Let’s all pull together to stop this nonsense!
Get women into positions of power that can shut down the volume of sex crimes for this generation and every generation to come! #Vote4Women!
Watch and share this TEDxTalk! Show it to your next powerful, female legislator!
I am victim of rape by fraud. I met a man, we started dating. We fell in love, but He knew from day one how I felt about dating a married man, so he lied. He told me he was not married. He even presented me with divorce papers. The divorce papers turned out to be forged and a fraud. When his lie was found out and confronted, he stated he wanted me so bad and knew that he would not have had a chance with me, so he lied. I am living with this pain as of today and want justice. I live in Texas. I want to report it to the police, but was told the state doesn’t view rape by deceit as a crime in the state of Texas. Any suggestions on what to do next?
M. Carr-
So sorry to hear of your pain. I understand the anguish you feel and my heart goes out to you!
It’s ironic that people justify lying as a means to seduce their victims. It’s pretty obvious that if your target would not have sex with you knowing the truth, you simply have no right to have sex with them at all! But still, they justify their lust as a legitimate excuse to take what is not theirs. If they coveted your Mercedes Benz and tricked you into giving it to them, they’d go to jail, but not if they tricked their way into your reproductive organs!
The state of Texas does not have a law against rape by fraud or impersonation. There is no definition for consent in your penal code. Your penal code only prosecutes specific types of sexual assaults that your legislators have deemed “without consent.” Rape by fraud or deception is not one of them. YOU can help change that! Here’s how:
1. Click on “Your Consent” in the upper right hand corner of this blog. Order the PDF.
2. Watch my TEDx Talk: http://bit.ly/2MvLpJp. Up-vote it and leave a comment. Share it with everyone you know and ask them to do the same.
3. Contact your local legislators. Send them the PDF and the link to my TEDx Talk. Insist that they enact the law defined in my TEDx Talk and explained in the PDF.
Right now, we have a legislator in Indiana and a legislator in NY working to enact consent-based laws in both their states. Your legislators in Texas can join with them to make a difference. I would be happy to introduce them to each other.
Great article Joyce. I think you hit the nail on the head when you said we need more women in these positions. When I reported my rape I had two male detectives speak with me. One of them I knew from high school. I feel that if a female had taken my report the perpetrator would be behind bars today instead of still out there abusing other women
Having you report the crime to an officer you were previously acquainted with was an egregious screw up on their part. Another was their failure to supply you with a victim’s advocate. Unfortunately, small town police prioritize getting rid of troubling cases that can taint the reputation of their town. They are poorly trained on conducting compassionate intake. Every precinct should have trained female detectives that are knowledgeable about the potential behaviors and fears of the victims they interact with.